Another day gone and no laughs - get in here – less artsy more fartsy
> The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar,
> You have passed all the tests, except one.
> It is a simple test of your English language skills
The mother-in-law arrives at her daughter's house after shopping only to find her son-in-law boiling
angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase.
A bloke goes into a chemist and says "Have you got any acetylsalicylic acid?"
"Do you mean aspirin" asked the pharmacist.
"That's it! I can...
I had my eyes tested today.
Afterwards, the doctor said, "Your eyes are in perfect condition."
"Really?" I replied, pulling out a picture of my...
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
'In honour of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each...
Serious drink drive warning - timely pre- Christmas!
I would like to share an experience with you all, about drinking and driving.
This was passed to me so once again have no control over audience laughter....enjoy ;)
Three Ladies in a Sauna
THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN
SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND....
''Take me somewhere for my 50th that reminds you of me," Asked my wife.
So I drove her 50 miles to a train station and she asked, "Where are we?"...
My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the...
(can't help the shows background laughter) ;)
A kangaroo kept escaping form his enclosure at the zoo.
Knowing that he could hop pretty high, zoo officials put up a ten foot high fence, but the...
Three women get together for coffee and the topic of conversation turns to contraception.
The first woman says "We've used the rythm method for...
His Lordship was in the study at Downton Abbey when the butler approached and and coughed discreetly.
"May I ask you a question my...
Two Indians and an Irishman were walking through the woods.
All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave.
BEST AUSSIE PICK UP LINE EVER:
A Aussie walks into a pub and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman..
He gives her a quick glance then...
If David Cameron, George Osborne and Ian Duncan Smith were all drowning and you could only save one of them.
Which pub would you go to?
9GAG - My dog - the paradox
Puns for Educated Minds
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it....
Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
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